Of everything that’s gone wrong. I’d like to say you’re the part I got right – but I’d be lying. And of all the things I wanted to do, the top goal was to be with you – forever, and I managed to mess that one up, too. And even though I want to, I can’t blame you, for not wanting to be with someone like me; I’m broken and sad, stubborn and tough. But even I couldn’t let down my own walls for whatever we had was.
And I’m so ashamed of what I’ve done. I’ve pushed away the only one who was willing to break down those walls if he had to. And I can’t believe I lost the best thing I should have been able to hold on to. But I lost … you.
The condescendence of this world on poor souls like mine, breaks me. It breaks me every time. And I wonder where I could go from here. But I’m still stuck in that same place where you said goodbye. Stuck in that same place in my life.
And I’m, I’m just afraid to connect again. I guess that’s my problem. I can’t even look anyone in the eyes anymore. Because they can’t look at me the way you did with that ever-so-lovely adoring look in your eyes as they were looking into mine.
And of all the things I wanted to do, the top goal was to be with you –forever.